Story Submission 7
I work changed some spelling errors as well as a few grammar mistakes. I had to fix punctuation as well and add some articles and change verb forms. I also broke down some sentences and word choices.
Trailing behind his father, Daniel kept his head down as he thought about the events from earlier. "Keep your head up boy, I'm sure he'll be fine," Thomas said, noticing his son's expression.
Looking up to meet his father's gaze, Daniel slowly nodded and focus ahead. "Alright," he said, giving his dad a reassuring smile and soon begins walking alongside him. His sudden change in demeanor didn't change his thoughts on Peter's outcome and what will happen.
Pausing in mid-thought once they came upon the communal area for lunch, Daniel smile as he saw his mother wave them. He makes his way over to hug and kisses her cheek before taking a seat on one side.
"Is it true that Peter punched Joshua?" his mother asks his father. He didn't hear what his father said as he began eating. Daniel notices that the lunch crowd was smaller than usual and how everyone chose to ignore it. Most continue eating and chatting among themselves, trying to hide the tension that appears to be building.
Daniel soon focuses on a small group of teens that were chatting among themselves while glancing towards The Place of Secrets. He continues eating his food but tries to listen in on the group, frowning that all the chatter made it harder. He got up and makes his way over to them. The group immediately stop talking once they saw Daniel approach and turns to look away or talk in smaller groups. Eyes furrow in confusion as he takes a seat across from a taller teen.
"What's going on?" he asks her. They shrug in response before continuing to eat their food as if ignoring him. Daniel proceeds to ask questions here and there but ended with the same responses. Daniel went back to his parents who were in a deep conversation with the Tailors about a new stitching method. He takes his seat as he debates on eating.
His stomach growls to remind him that he hasn't eaten anything since Mrs. Baker's honey buns from this morning. Slowly he began eating when he notices Scarlet eating by herself. She looks depressed and it was easy to see why. He knew how close she and Peter were especially since she was Peter's first friend. Daniel talked to her a few times when they were doing their daily tasks or when they were in class. Although their usual conversations involve Daniel explaining something and Scarlet pitching in.
Debating if he should go to her, Daniel notices the other adults starting to gather their things and clean up their messes. He realizes that lunch was over and that he should return to class or begin his work in the fields. Deciding that he had a better chance to keep an eye on The Place of Secrets while in the fields. Quickly tossing his trash away, David explains to his father his plan on starting early on his work. Thomas agreed since he knew that some of the town folk will not be leaving their homes in fear of The Sickness.
After stopping by his house to grab his tools, Daniel wonders towards the field closet to The Place of Secrets. He notices a flow of ravens, circling around and around a fixed point on the ground a bit farther in. Grabbing his shovel, Daniel made his way towards the spot until he saw the Ravens picking at a fallen scarecrow. The strawed man clothes were ripped and torn beyond that of a usual scarecrow. Waving his shovel around to scare the ravens away, Daniel crotches down to get a closer look. He notices the hay in the scarecrow shift and slowly lifts it, spotting a small nest of bunnies. By the looks of them, Daniel assumes they were a few weeks old or so. He picks one up, smiling as the little bunny started to nuzzle and nip at his hand before curling against him.
"I wonder where's your mama," he said as he strokes the one in his hand before setting it down. He glances up at the ravens that waited nearby and covers the rabbit's nest. Daniel continues his work not far from the nest, keeping a close eye on the rabbits as some ravens flew close again before being scared off. During one of his breaks, David filled a small lid with water and place it under the scarecrow.
He continues on his job, stopping a few times to say hello to his fellow workers or explain why the scarecrow was down. Daniel's mind was starting to clear as he hopes for a brighter end to this cloudy day.
Trailing behind his father, Daniel kept his head down as he thought about the events from earlier. "Keep your head up boy, I'm sure he'll be fine," Thomas said, noticing his son's expression.
Looking up to meet his father's gaze, Daniel slowly nodded and focus ahead. "Alright," he said, giving his dad a reassuring smile and soon begins walking alongside him. His sudden change in demeanor didn't change his thoughts on Peter's outcome and what will happen.
Pausing in mid-thought once they came upon the communal area for lunch, Daniel smile as he saw his mother wave them. He makes his way over to hug and kisses her cheek before taking a seat on one side.
"Is it true that Peter punched Joshua?" his mother asks his father. He didn't hear what his father said as he began eating. Daniel notices that the lunch crowd was smaller than usual and how everyone chose to ignore it. Most continue eating and chatting among themselves, trying to hide the tension that appears to be building.
Daniel soon focuses on a small group of teens that were chatting among themselves while glancing towards The Place of Secrets. He continues eating his food but tries to listen in on the group, frowning that all the chatter made it harder. He got up and makes his way over to them. The group immediately stop talking once they saw Daniel approach and turns to look away or talk in smaller groups. Eyes furrow in confusion as he takes a seat across from a taller teen.
"What's going on?" he asks her. They shrug in response before continuing to eat their food as if ignoring him. Daniel proceeds to ask questions here and there but ended with the same responses. Daniel went back to his parents who were in a deep conversation with the Tailors about a new stitching method. He takes his seat as he debates on eating.
His stomach growls to remind him that he hasn't eaten anything since Mrs. Baker's honey buns from this morning. Slowly he began eating when he notices Scarlet eating by herself. She looks depressed and it was easy to see why. He knew how close she and Peter were especially since she was Peter's first friend. Daniel talked to her a few times when they were doing their daily tasks or when they were in class. Although their usual conversations involve Daniel explaining something and Scarlet pitching in.
Debating if he should go to her, Daniel notices the other adults starting to gather their things and clean up their messes. He realizes that lunch was over and that he should return to class or begin his work in the fields. Deciding that he had a better chance to keep an eye on The Place of Secrets while in the fields. Quickly tossing his trash away, David explains to his father his plan on starting early on his work. Thomas agreed since he knew that some of the town folk will not be leaving their homes in fear of The Sickness.
After stopping by his house to grab his tools, Daniel wonders towards the field closet to The Place of Secrets. He notices a flow of ravens, circling around and around a fixed point on the ground a bit farther in. Grabbing his shovel, Daniel made his way towards the spot until he saw the Ravens picking at a fallen scarecrow. The strawed man clothes were ripped and torn beyond that of a usual scarecrow. Waving his shovel around to scare the ravens away, Daniel crotches down to get a closer look. He notices the hay in the scarecrow shift and slowly lifts it, spotting a small nest of bunnies. By the looks of them, Daniel assumes they were a few weeks old or so. He picks one up, smiling as the little bunny started to nuzzle and nip at his hand before curling against him.
"I wonder where's your mama," he said as he strokes the one in his hand before setting it down. He glances up at the ravens that waited nearby and covers the rabbit's nest. Daniel continues his work not far from the nest, keeping a close eye on the rabbits as some ravens flew close again before being scared off. During one of his breaks, David filled a small lid with water and place it under the scarecrow.
He continues on his job, stopping a few times to say hello to his fellow workers or explain why the scarecrow was down. Daniel's mind was starting to clear as he hopes for a brighter end to this cloudy day.
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